September Year: 2008

F1 move to BBC Commentators

30th Sep 2008 · · Link

OK the rumours are that Martin Brundle will be the commentator with none other than the retired racing driver (after this season) David Coultard.

I believe that Brundle is his manager.



Poorly Hallucinations

29th Sep 2008 · · Link

Having children pretty much guarantees that your going to get colds.

This one however is a really top one, not only do I feel randomly dizzy now and again and have a throat that would make Barry White's voice sound high pitched but I keep Hallucinating as well.

I'm not new to Hallucinations as I suffer from migraine and occasionally get them then, but these are wierd ones, and so far I've seen:

Moving fire extinguishers

Small children - This one I don't like and it freaks me out a bit

Moving walls - wobbling around in front of me to the point I have to touch them.

I really shouldn't be in work today

Best use of internet this year

28th Sep 2008 · · Link

This is just a genius advert for the wii.

Found this via fazed.net.

Just keep watching it, you'll see.

Fridays List

26th Sep 2008 · · Link

Had quite a lazy week this week due to a bit of a cold and as such many movies have been watched (as well as Boston Legal). Anyhoo, I can recommend that you DON'T see 'Get Smart', it's pretty rubbish. And Don't mess with the Zohan is well, possibly the oddest film I have ever seen. It's possibly not a great movie, but I urge you to see it, it really is so odd I promise you you'll watch it to the end and then possibly have no opinion of the movie other than to say it is 'Odd'.

Ok, when I and many people have a cold they tend to feel a bit sorry for themselves, so 50 things to say before you die might be appropriate. But frankly I can think of much better things to say just before I die, my top 6:

  1. Here hold this grenade for me will you.

  2. Remember the car has a service on Tuesday

  3. My tests came back positive i'm afraid

  4. It's really important, but in the house behind the cooker is a............

  5. I'm gay (or conversley I'm NOT gay)

  6. Could you do me a favour and change my underwear for me, these ones arn't clean



Quickies: This I agree with | Error Messages | Fast Maths | Funny Or Die UK

McDonalds is getting a bit odd:


M.I.A. Paper Planes, I currently love this song, old school bringing it to the future.
I especially like the guns and cash register (keep listening).

And the lyrics, as I know you want them :)

(Two Times)
I fly like paper, get high like planes
If you catch me at the border I got visas in my name
If you come around here, I make 'em all day
I get one down in a second if you wait

(Two Times)
Sometimes I think sitting on trains
Every stop I get to I'm clocking that game
Everyone's a winner now we're making that fame
Bonafide hustler making my name

(Four Times)
All I wanna do is (BANG BANG BANG BANG!)
And (KKKAAAA CHING!)
And take your money

(Two Times)
Pirate skulls and bones
Sticks and stones and weed and bongs
Running when we hit 'em
Lethal poison through their system

(Two Times)
No one on the corner has swag like us
Hit me on my burner prepaid wireless
We pack and deliver like UPS trucks
Already going hell just pumping that gas

(Four Times)
All I wanna do is (gun gun gun gun)
And (ching)
And take your money

M.I.A.
Third world democracy
Yeah, I got more records than the K.G.B.
So, uh, no funny business

Some some some I some I murder
Some I some I let go
Some some some I some I murder
Some I some I let go

Human Race at Greyhound Track

25th Sep 2008 · · Link

Yes I am in last, but I did have to start in last. Also I look a bit like the Michelin Man as I always had a top on and was given another 'striped' top to put over the top for betting reasons. The top was too small for me.



And man does it look slow!
Probably was slow, but running on wet sand is quite the odd experience.

Super Edgy Wednesday List

24th Sep 2008 · · Link

I've been accused of not being edgy enough on the list, so this week I'm going to start dialing it up a notch.

Starting with this image and of course, this is quite amusing



Evil Men anyone?

Women, ever wondered what men go through when drinking beer, I refer of course to the Beer Goggles effects.

We all have to deal with stupid ignorant fu&$s now and again, well, just remember that The customer is not always right.

Putting a funny slant on things at the expense of many peoples lives is always good viewin', the Onion have managed to do it excellently with Alcohol, "Wanna dance, fat boy?".

This guy seems to be pointing at something, can't think what.

Remember my post about Sky+ and how to improve it.
Well I was around a Sky workers house and they get to try out the new layouts and stuff, although currently incredibly slow they have now introduced the 'Get Info' on programs later on from the On screen display. I'm sure people will hate it (it really is very different) much in the same way people dis-like the new facebook.

Frankly I think the new facebook is better than the old one. Live with it, it's not going to change. If your upset about something changing, then your too old to be on Facebook.

Funny Accident Claim Forms

23rd Sep 2008 · · Link

This is a link to a part of the opanoid website from many many years ago. I just noticed it was still popular and that it might not have been viewed by everyone, so I have artificially added it in as a previous post.

Here is the link the article is quite long (it's a list of funny accident claim forms) but worth a read if you want to kill half and hour.

Well done the US on Ryder Cup victory

22nd Sep 2008 · · Link

They wanted it more, and Faldo's decisions really didn't pay off (nothing to mention that not many golfers actually like Faldo, especially Montgomerie hence not being in the team).

Enjoyed the event though, and Poulter of whome I really wasn't keen, really came across as a top top world class player.

Kim and Garcia on the last day really could do with some sportsmanship lessons as both frankly seemed to just piss off the other to such a degree that they both needed to be reminded they are on a world stage. Garcia should know better and Kim should have been taken aside and told better, but you live and learn I suppose.

All round it's good the US won, as if they didn't I feel the Ryder Cup would have become a non-event if the European side had won again.

Overall some top golf, very much enjoyed.

Update: The BBC tv coverage of this was, on the first day, terrible but got much better from the second day (this refers to the actual picture and sound, it was at times actually unwatchable). A different thing altogether was the interviews and the BBC News website. it was awful, avoiding difficult questions on the TV and not tackling the questions that people wanted answers too on the website such as sportsmanship (on both sides I hasten to add), in fact as of writing this I cannot find anyone with the balls to properly report the sportsmanship (or lack thereof) of some of the golfers (spectators in my opinion are not included as controlling the general public is just not possible).

Fill The Void List

Six days ago · · Link

Sooooo busy, but thought i would post what has been gathered this past two weeks, enjoy:


Cee Lo Green - F You (the original isn't bad either


Strange Photo

Patience (stop motion)
I'm patient, but I don't think I could do this for a living.

Do you do this?

Still not using it

Jumpin'


Lucky F'ers.


Extended Version of Prince of Bel Air
It's just not right. (lyrics follow)



And the lyrics:
Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I liked to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air

In west Philadelphia born and raised
On the playground is where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And all shootin some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys
Who were up to no good
Startin making trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air'

I begged and pleaded with her day after day
But she packed my suite case and send me on my way
She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket.
I put my walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it'.

First class, yo this is bad
Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the people of Bel-Air Living like?
Hmmmmm this might be alright.
I whistled for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I can say this cab is rare
But I thought 'Now forget it' - 'Yo homes to Bel Air'

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later'
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air



GeoTagged List

20th Aug 2010 · · Link

Afternoon all, Jesus tees off first hitting his ball straight into the water hazard. He simply walks across the water and hits his ball just short of the green. When Moses tees off, he hits his ball into the same water hazard. So, he parts the water and puts his golf ball just shy of the hole. As the old man tees off he hits his ball with tremendous power, but hooks it badly. It bounces off a tree and hits the caddy shack. It then rolls down a path to a pond where a frog eats the ball and swims to the other side of the pond. Suddenly an eagle swoops down and grabs the frog and flies off. As the eagle is flying over the green the frog drops the ball. The ball drops directly into the hole for a hole in one. Moses turns to Jesus and says "I hate playing golf with your Dad."

As the world quickly scrambles to change their FaceBook Profiles to disable Location settings I bring you the List:

Wow

Think Shes a Keeper

Remember kids, always Tip Your Midwife - ?!?!

YoYo Champ - And rightly so


Thanks to Kev for this one, Missy - Genius, I've sent this to 3 designers, they all rang me within 10 minutes laughing.

From the 'How to talk to the geeks about things and not have them laugh at you' Section: HTML5 and what it's all about

Katy B - On a Mission


Drivin' Fast.
Almost a quarter of drivers think it is acceptable to speed if they think the limit is too low - Tick that's me.
Drivers still distinguish between 'ordinary, safe speeding drivers' and 'dangerous speeding drivers' - Tick That's me too.
Motorists caught racing through motorway roadworks ended up being hit by more than £5m worth of speeding tickets last year. - Not been done on this, thankfully.
Of all the speeding offences 90+% are fixed penally notices. - Tick, got done by this.

Thought of the week.
Apple is very closed, they are right, everyone else is wrong (suppliers). However it was noted on a website that Apple have sent an update out for OS X that fixes graphics issues.
This is pretty much due in part to Valve releasing games for the Mac. It's further rumoured that the uptake of the games is astronomical.
Nothing Like a shit load of money to make Apple stand to attention.

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